Dr Chapman gives us some subsets, if you will, of this language. He says we can use encouraging words, kind words and humble words…and this reminds us that words are important! I will add that the heart behind what we say is equally important. When I pray, I often say, “Lord, please give me the words and the heart through which to say them.” Because saying the right thing in the wrong way, will end up causing more problems than resolving any. With this in mind, here is a practical event that happened in my own marriage.
Recently, I have been having some health issues, and one day I was feeling so miserable that I just wanted to lie on the couch and sleep, but I did not want to be alone. I asked my husband to stay with me while I rested…I am not sure what he heard me say, but he went about doing whatever he wanted to and did not sit with me as I had requested. Needless to say, I was NOT a happy camper. Sadly throwing fire onto fire, I became angry. I stopped talking to him and opened my mind up to the lies of the enemy who was trying to convince me that Joe just didn’t care about me. Again, I knew they were lies, but when our love tank is empty, there is plenty of room for garbage to come in.
The next day, with tension in the air, it just so happened that Joe had to be out of the house for a couple of hours. The whole time he was gone, I could sense God urging me to make peace, to apologize for my poor reaction… which did not make me any happier by the way…but I knew it was the right thing to do. So when Joe came home, before I could do anything, he immediately hugged me and spoke those words of affirmation to my heart! He said, “I love you and you are so very important to me. I am sorry.” I melted! I also apologized and just like that, both our love tanks were filled up and peace and joy and unity were restored in our home.
I will say again, words are important! Use them wisely.
2023’s Got A Minute? Book Club
January: The Bible
February: “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman
<>< Peace, Diane
