I have already mentioned the next topic of this book. It is how money affects every relationship, especially marriages. Today we will focus on married couples, and get to Singles tomorrow. Mr Ramsey talks about how opposites attract. There is usually one spouse that’s the spender and the other the saver, for instance. He says, “But those differences also add a lot of fun and spice to a healthy marriage – as long as you agree on the important stuff.” (p27) After Faith, boundaries with in-laws and parenting, money, and how to handle it, is the next priority we must learn to see eye to eye on, if we hope to have a peaceful and lasting relationship. The author notes, “Agreeing on money unlock so many doors to a strong marriage because money is rarely just about money. How we handle money in our relationships involves power, priorities, dreams, passions, and ultimately, our value system.” (p27) This is one of the reasons the Bible talks about our finances so much, it has a way of revealing our inner heart attitudes. Pride, greed, certain fears and lack of trust in God and others, can play a big part in how we choose to deal with money. And when we are not on the same page…well, understanding that this can cause issues is, hopefully, the first step to avoiding them.
Mr Ramsey asks, then answers, “So if men and women are so different, who is supposed to do the financial decision making in a marriage? BOTH!… Sure, one person is going to have a natural bent towards budgeting, and working with numbers, but the decision making has to be done by both partners.” (p29) He says that most marriages have a Nerd, who is more organized and good with numbers, and a Free Spirit, who is not as detail oriented and normally just goes with the flow. Then there also is the Spender and the Saver which are not necessarily the same person as the Nerd and the Free Spirit. I think our greatest take away is to know our, and our spouse’s character, so that we can work with each other’s strengths, as well as help each other out with our weaknesses. So if my strength is writing out budgets and my husband’s is knowing how much things cost, we work together to make the plan fit our needs and still live within our means. The point is, both spouses have to be involved because it is a partnership…later when children are old enough, they too can get involved in the discussion, but it is still Mom and Dad that make the final decisions because they are the adults and should be leading the children, not the other way around!
In order to do this, both spouses must come together and hash things out at least once a month, before the month starts, to make sure things will be moving along in a way that blesses everyone. Mr Ramsey calls this the Budget Committee Meeting, and he gives certain rules for both the Nerd and the Free Spirit to follow, so things can go smoothly. (see p31 in the book) I will end with this point from our author, “The key to winning with money in marriage is teamwork. If you’re not working together on your plan, your plan’s not working.” (p30) Some tips for Singles tomorrow
2023’s Got A Minute? Book Club
January: The First & Best Book Ever: The Bible
February: Love Is In the Air: “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman
March: Spring Growth: “Secrets of the Vine” by Bruce Wilkinson
April: Living the Resurrected Life: “The Wonderful Spirit Filled Life” by Dr Charles Stanley
May: My Spiritual Mom: “Making Good Habits Breaking Bad Habits” by Joyce Meyer
June: Spiritual Dad: “It’s Not About Me- Rescue from the Life We Thought Would Make Us Happy” by Max Lucado
July: Financial Freedom “Complete Guide to Money” by Dave Ramsey
<>< Peace, Diane
