Dr Chapman has tests in the back of the book, one for the man and the other for the woman, so you can discover your love languages. Yet he cautions that there are two types of people that might find if hard to do so. 1- if the person has been so emotionally full for so long, they may have difficulty narrowing down exactly which way their spouse loves them, is their primary language. What a nice problem to have, right? Or 2- the person has been emotionally empty for so long they don’t even remember what makes them feel loved. How heartbreaking! Yet there is always Hope especially when both spouses are willing to put Dr Chapman’s suggestions to the test. He recommends going back to the experience of falling in love. What did you love about your spouse back then? What did they do or say that made you want to be with them? He says to “conjure up those memories,” and allow those emotions to rise up within you again. As I have said before, do not forget why you fell in love in the first place. Then seek your love language as well as your spouses, making your best guess if you have to, and share your list in order of importance with one another. It will be interesting to see if you do know each other’s language or not.
Dr Chapman then encourages all married couples, troubled or not, to play the following game 3 times a week for three weeks, until they know their spouses love language. He calls it the “Tank Check.” I am not going to go through it because I do really recommend this book to all of you, married or not, but especially married. As a matter of fact, if you know someone who is getting married, here is a great gift you can bless them with! As the joke goes, God desires for the man and wife to become one, but it is the becoming that is the real challenge! Whatever resources we can use to gain healthier and healthier relationships is so well worth the investment. Investment is buying the book. Investment is reading it. But more importantly, investment is applying it. We are made for relationships…healthy ones…so do yourself, and if you are married your spouse, a big favor: sincerely consider making this book your next read, if you ever have read it. Once again, it is called: “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman.
Just a disclaimer, I do not get paid for recommending any of these books. But they have blessed me so much that I know they will bless you too. We will finish up this great book tomorrow…
2023’s Got A Minute? Book Club
January: The Bible
February: “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman
<>< Peace, Diane
